BTF House

From Wiki Gonzalez

As discussed in this Lounge, Scoriano Flitcraft's dream house is this lovely piece of property complete with basement bowling alley. UCCF suggested that the Primates band together and purchase the property, creating a neo-BTF frat house. 227,000 donations of $100 should get the job done.

Extra Innings would be a necessity, though picking a game might lead to some disputes. TCM will be shown when baseball or game highlights are unavailable. Bags of Cheetos and Fiddle Faddle and packages of Ring Dings will be provided for leisurely snacking. Eccles cakes will be provided upon request.

Beer and whiskey runs would require significant logistics. A Quiznos franchise would be on-site, accompanied by a food stand selling homemade potato chips and slow-cooked BBQ meats. Alternatively, a well-stocked pantry and kitchen in which Primates can prepare their favorite recipes would be a snap to set up.

For athletic endeavors, Primer Field, replete with ivy-covered walls, would have to be constructed, preferably using taxpayer money. For indoor recreation, there could be a model train layout to rival the one on "Silver Spoons" and a recording studio in which to create indie music or jazz. An air-conditioned room in which to play poker and other games of skill is also a possibility. A well-lit portion of the main building should be converted to a library and reading room to house BTF's literature collection.

An added benefit of the purchase is the formation of a significant voting bloc. In fact, it was surmised that the BTF House would have its own BTF congressperson serving their interests.